Good or Bad? Which Inner Voice Are You Listening To?

“The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift."” 

– Albert Einstein

Cartoons are fun. Although I am an adult now, I still enjoy watching cartoons and in case you are wondering the answer is no – I don’t have any kids. Many cartoons have an episode where the cartoon character (whether it’s Homer Simpson, Sylvester the Cat or Donald Duck) is split between doing the right thing or doing something evil. Typically, you’ll see a little devil and a little angel on the shoulders of the cartoon character.

We are no different than those cartoons. Many times we are caught in the middle, maybe not between good and evil, but between positive and negative thoughts. We go back and forth between what we should do and what we should say and many times we follow the wrong inner voice.

The Bad Inner Voice

The bad inner voice is unfortunately the voice we listen to the most. This is the inner voice that brings you doubt – “you can’t do it.” This is the inner voice that gives you discouragement – “give up.” This is the inner voice that makes you feel guilty that tells you that “this is your reality” and tries to give you reasons why things “won’t work.” This inner voice also convinces you that you are not good enough, smart enough, creative enough or passionate enough. The worst part of this inner voice is that it knows you well and it uses fear to its advantage. It convinces you that everything can and will go wrong. This inner voice is powerful and sometimes we let it get the best of us.

The Good Inner Voice

The good inner voice can be more powerful than the bad inner voice. However, sometimes we are quick to shut the door on this voice. This inner voice is encouraging – “just try it.” This inner voice can motivate you – “you can do it.” Many times, the good inner voice seems as though it’s just a daydream because it makes things seem possible that might seem impossible. The good inner voice believes in you, believes in your ability, your skill set and your intentions.

Unfortunately, we think many times that the inner voice is just a fantasy voice, a voice that paints unicorns and rainbows. So what do we do? We shut it down and listen to the voice that makes more sense to us – the bad inner voice. That’s the voice that keeps it real, right?

Remember, the good inner voice targets the heart and the bad inner voice targets the mind. You are better than you think, if not, that good inner voice would never be there. Follow your heart a little more. Which voice should you start listening to? 

Don't forget to share this blog so you can encourage others: family, co-workers, friends. Give them something to get motivated! You never know what they might be going through. A few words of encouragement can go a long way.  

3 Lies You Tell Yourself Quite Often

“Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice.” 

– Steve Jobs

Last week I finished facilitating a two-month training for a company in Southern California. I trained approximately 25 managers on topics such as leadership, management, communication and coaching. The managers embarked on a journey to become better managers to lead their teams to their full potential.

During our coaching session, we discussed ways to properly train, motivate and engage a team. During one of our discussions, one of the managers shared with me that he has trouble motivating people because he’s not a good motivator. In that same session, another manager said how difficult it was to train her employees because she has no patience.

These comments are very typical for managers to say and are comments we tell ourselves quite often. I responded to these comments from the managers with a simple question: ”who told you that?”

Many times we convince ourselves that we are a certain way or we can’t do a certain thing. We think other people believe these things about us and we unfortunately use other people’s comments to confirm what we already believed about ourselves. These are lies, though. Time and time again I see people breakthrough these lies. Below are three common lies that hold us back.

I am not good enough

Many times, managers (or people in general) make comments such as “I am not a good motivator,” “I am not a good public speaker,” or “I’m just not good with numbers.” People are just not born motivating others or knowing how to speak in public. These are skills that can be learned and applied with time. Instead of telling yourself lies, ask yourself these questions:  

• How can I become better
• What can I change about myself to become better?
• How can I change? Am I willing to change?

You are good enough. In fact, I can guarantee that you’re better than you think. There is a lot of untapped talent and potential if you just get passed those lies you invented.

I can’t do that

The word can’t is one of the worst words you can use in your vocabulary. “I can’t resist chocolate,” “I can’t find time to go to the gym,” and “I can’t make it on time because I live far,” are the most common lies you can tell yourself. These are our favorite excuses and the word can’t is supposed to make it seem as though there is an external force out of our control that won’t allow us to overcome these obstacles.

Instead of always relying on the word ‘can’t’, substitute that word for the question, “How can I…?” For example, “how can I lose 15 lbs?”, or “how can I make time to go to the gym.”

Force yourself to find solutions instead of making excuses. You can do anything and I can, once again, guarantee that you have overcome obstacles in the past that not too many people could. You are stronger than you think.

That’s just not me

By now, you have a pre-conceived notion of who you are and who you are not. You have convinced yourself that you are not patient, you are not a leader, you are not assertive or that you are not joyful. I believe we have all these qualities inside of us and many times we actually utilize these qualities. For example, have you ever waited an hour in LA traffic? That’s patience! Yes, some people are more patient than others, but many times we are the ones that choose what quality we do or don’t exercise. Therefore, any time that our job or our family requires our patience, for example, we tend to run away and choose not to exercise our patience.

You possess great qualities in a human. You have the power to think, act and become anything. You can be a strong leaders, a patient parent, a loving boss, a joyful employee, an assertive project leader and an empathetic colleague. You just choose not to focus on those qualities you need. You can become anything you want, but you must convince yourself first.

Sometimes are jobs or our personal lives force us to be something we’re not. Perhaps you weren’t so responsible before but your career forced you to be responsible. I can guarantee (my last guarantee) that who you are now is not the same person who you were 5 years ago, and it won’t be the same person who you will 5 years from now. Who do you want to be? Do you want to be extraordinary or a person who keeps believing your own lies?

Don't forget to share this blog so you can encourage others: family, co-workers, friends. Give them something to get motivated! You never know what they might be going through. A few words of encouragement can go a long way.  

What Will Your Attitude Be Like Today?

"You can be happy or mad."

- My mother

There are many things I remember about my childhood. I remember trips we took, soccer games I played and things my mom did or said. For example, my mom loved her chancla (sandal). She not only used them to walk around the house but she would use it as a threat if you did something wrong. Her aim was so good she could hit anything from a mile away.

Besides her chancla, I remember my mother’s words. As a kid, I would pout about the advice my mom was giving me or the guidance she would provide. Whenever I was angry about something, my mom would say in Spanish, “puedes contentarte o enojarte – como tu quieras.” This translates to “you can be happy or mad, it’s up to you.”

We might not think of our attitude as a choice but it truly is. Attitude is a lever we have inside us that we can actually control. Anyone can tell what mood you’re in. They can tell by your body language, your choice of words and, more importantly, your face. Your attitude will control the rest of your body and mind, but you must control it first. John C. Maxwell said, “people may hear your words, but they can feel your attitude.”

The interesting thing about our attitude is that it’s contagious. If someone is having a bad day it can also get to us. However, if you bring joy to your office or your department it can also get to those around you. Attitude is something powerful. Think about the times you might have had someone at work or in your home nagging, complaining, bitter or depressed. Doesn’t it fill the atmosphere in the room or in that place?

You will decide what your attitude will be today. You have the power to control it. Will you shine in positivity, smiles and joy or will you drown others with your unpleasant attitude? Like my mother said, “it’s up to you.”

Don't forget to share this blog so you can encourage others: family, co-workers, friends. Give them something to get motivated! You never know what they might be going through. A few words of encouragement can go a long way.